Reflective Essay: Vibrating the Strings

     One thing I like about Korean Minjok Leadership Academy (KMLA) is that it gives me different opportunities. Unlike other high schools, the school encourages different extracurricular activities. Opportunity was one of the strengths of KMLA written for admission and now I know that it is true. Through KMLA's winter program, I regained my skiing skills, which I neglected for about 4 years. Through art class, playing with Photoshop once again became my interest. There are many other new opportunities given to me, and they were all delightful. But to pick the one that I am most happy about, it is being able to play my violin again.

     To speak my life history, I started fiddling with violin from about 8 years old. Piano came before, but the ability to move all ten fingers at once seemed to be absent from me. Violin soon became my hobby, and I played it for five years. This might be a short time period for violin manias, but for an inconsistent person like me, the period was long. Also, the reason I had to quit was because of my busy middle school life, which upset me. That time, I believed that I could start playing violin whenever I wanted to, and regain my hobby again. Sadly, this thought came from ignorance of my poor musical talents. Two years later, I forgot to tune my violin, let alone playing it. Due to my musical atrophy, I did not touch my violin again until I went into KMLA.

     Before going to KMLA, I heard about two distinct orchestras: KMLA Orchestra and Minjok Orchestra. Suddenly, I felt this strong desire to play my violin again. However, after opening my violin case, I was soon very upset at my fingers which did not move according to my own will. Worse, I even forgot how to comprehend the musical scores. Dumbfounded, all that was left for me was practice. Through practice, skill improved slowly and gradually, but I was still happy. Actually, for the past years, I was sad that I did not have any musical instruments that I could play properly. Even though I was clumsy, being able to play the violin made me smile.

     What started as a desire to go into an orchestra tuned into enjoying playing again. Eventually, I went into the KMLA Orchestra, where we learned several pieces. Practicing those pieces, I enjoyed being able to create sound once more with the violin. I frequently made mistakes, so I tried hard to cover them with practice. On top of that, what motivated me for practicing was probably the fact that I did not wanted to make mistakes that will ruin the whole song of harmony. My brain told me that ruining will mean humiliation, and I certainly did not want to get humiliated.

           The orchestra was preparing for the school’s concert, which definitely excited me. Years have passed since I last played for the public. I wanted to do well. There were practices every first self-study period and during lunch time. The practices felt tiresome, but when actually practicing, the worries were gone and I felt some sort of catharsis. Practices passed, and the concert day had come. After a deep breath, the show started. Our song went quite well without any serious problems. The concert was thrilling as the audience clapped. Once again, I felt the feeling that I felt years ago: enjoyment.

     From the day I picked up my musical friend, I never regretted about playing violin again. It gave me more pleasure than I expected and returned me a hobby. Now, I do not feel upset about not being able to play musical instruments. Instead, I feel happy about regaining one of my lost skills. I cannot say that I am fluent, but I can say that I truly enjoy vibrating the strings.